As much fun as all my adventuring looked it took quite a toll. Compared to Canada where I had no worries, I didn’t over exert myself, I took naps everyday and all the relaxation resulted in hardly any head pain at all. The second part of our trip was a lot of fun but we did so much. The hikes looked fun but I had head pain at every turn. Sometimes severe! But I so badly just wanted to get away from head pain that I pushed and pushed and by Sat night I had hit a wall. I was down by 6:00, had no interest in dinner and slept fitfully through the night. The ride home was long but I stayed alert because that’s all I could do through the storms and driving at dusk through storm debris.
The drive took its toll but when I got home and came back to reality, I remembered all the bills piling up, the inspections on the old house to be done, the long term disability paperwork that came telling me that none of the Drs and hospitals had sent in any paperwork and short term disability ends in 4 days, the small claims suit from the old renters that needed clarifying with the court, prescriptions to be picked up and a $1000 prescription bill to get refunded because Cobra took so long I had to pay out of pocket, oh and Gideon had to register for preschool today which meant filling out all necessary paperwork and gathering all documents needed and then pick him up because I thought this was when they got to see the school and meet teachers but it was just all paperwork, and then I had to pick up milk and then get Josiah and come home to take a nap only to be interrupted by a phone call from my Drs office saying they reviewed my case and are extending my leave through the end of November but none of the paperwork has been started and wasn’t sure when they would get it in, and finally another call from the well and septic guy telling how much the inspection would be plus they would likely have to dig the well. We have always been nervous that they would make us drill a new well…now we will finally know. So now I lay back in bed not feeling well and with very bad head pain 😓.
I haven’t been posting about my head pain because it was becoming my life and I hated that but the fact is, it is my life that is why the diagnosis includes “new daily persistent headache” which means it never really goes away. I just need to learn ways to live with the pain like putting ear plugs in to go to church, into restaurants or basically anywhere where things are loud and chaotic, which means sometimes in my own home or car when the kids are with me. Or sleep, this I am good at but naps don’t work when you don’t or can’t take them. Or take the medicine that I can only take two times a week for pain because there is no alternative.
Our live have completely changed for this season in our lives. I know I am better than 6 months ago but then again I am not because it still has control over my life everyday. I go back to the Head Pain clinic next Monday. So we will see what the next steps are on this journey.
my family's new normal 